Don’t worry guys,
this isn’t me giving you dating advice… How awful would that be?! You’d be
single foreverrrr! LOL! No matter what platform of online dating it is that
you’re using they’re all the same. I can’t say that I’ve been on them all so
this isn’t fact it’s fiction however we all know I’m right. I do however hope that this makes you laugh, at me or with me both are okay.
In
this generation finding love is hard, we are unwilling to settle for anything
less than what we deserve and why should we? Don’t you believe that what will make you happy IS the best? These days we don’t meet people the old “fashioned way” as my nan
says, That’s okay too! Were moving with the times, were busy! A swipe here and
there while we use the water closet is more covenant to us in our chaotic
lives. This isn’t to say online app dating is for everyone, go to a bar!
Flutter those luscious lashes at the sexy guy across from you! Go and sit next
to the pretty lady in the coffee shop and pay her a compliment, make someone’s
day.
So
how do you online date? I believe that a picture is worth a thousand words. Finding
your “match” on a dating app is mainly judged on first impressions, your
photos, your humour or even your directness can determine your match success.
You have to think about your fashion choices, your friends not being better
looking than you (sorry truth hurts), keeping the photos up to date!! No one
likes a catfish! Avoid photos with your car or ten cats, too many group photos…
Which one are you?! or even photos surrounded by the opposite sex.
Then
there’s the bio, apparently writing too much can seem boring and too little is unattractive
and lazy… We can’t win!! I say the best bio is honest, short and witty. Make
your bio a conversation starter. Try your best to not sound negative, things
like… “not looking for a hookup!” Or… “no time wasters” you’re not going to
attract anyone with that attitude hahaha! Put some of your charming personality
into your bio! Be yourself, you attract what you put out there! I personally believe
a mans height should not be in his bio we shouldn’t discriminate against height.
Okay if you’re a tall girl I understand however, you 5 foot nothing girls… Would you like it if a guy kept asking your dress or bra size?!
No? Didn’t think so.
I believe
you should be upfront and state your intentions in what you’re looking for, if
you’re not looking for the one but just “the one for now” (as my cousin calls
it!) Amazing I know, she also gives other great advice like… don’t worry about
kissing too many frogs Saffron, it’s called “actively seeking the one”. She’s
amazing I know. This basically means if you’re just on these dating apps to
find the one for the evening or the one as a regular then just be honest! There
will be someone out there that wants exactly what you do and being honest may
make them more willing to participate in such wild activities you’ve dreamed up
in your head from that photo of them in their bikini…
So you’ve
got your first match? What next! Be an eager beaver!! Send that first message,
guys I get it… “Why should the man message first all the time?!” You’re right, you
shouldn’t. Basically stop being a lil B and send a message, women this goes for you also! And
before you girls say “hello” or “Hi!” is just so lazy or why should I reply to
that! I’m sure it’s what you would do if you met someone in a bar right?! The easiest
way to avoid this though is to just pick something that stood
out to you from their profile and try to crack a joke?
When
do we stop talking online and meet in person? Is it safe to meet this person?
How do we decide that we want to see that person again? Or even if we want
something more from that person? And finally… when do we delete the app?
Soooooo many questions and there is one simple answer to them all.
COMMUNICATION. Were all adults here just talk, I know easier said than done. I’m
being a massive hypocrite here too but that’s me, good at giving advise not
good at taking it.
If you’re a lover of catfish like myself, you’ll know there are unspoken rules and regulations to online dating...
Allowing a
conversation to drag on for weeks without a date. You may think you’re
“connecting”, but you can’t judge chemistry unless you meet up. If you don’t want to see this person again you don’t have
too, just be an adult and explain why! I mean don’t be too brutally honest and
hurt anyone’s feelings but you see where i'm going.
Baggage
and loose ends be gone! Everyone has a past, an ex or bad previous
relationships! Don’t bring this into your new dating life, keep quiet until
you know each other better. You'll ruin things by comparing to your pervious expierences
not everyone will treat you bad! Have a little faith, don’t let the good one’s
escape!
Finallllllyyyyyy!!!
Having sex doesn’t make you a bad person or a floozy, and it won’t necessarily
ruin your chances of a relationship with that person. If you’re both concenting
adults, single and you use protection, it’s your choice! However, if you’d
rather wait, then that’s your choice too.
Let me know if i've missed any good ones!!
Toodle Pip!
Just Saffron.
xo
Let me know if i've missed any good ones!!
Toodle Pip!
Just Saffron.
xo
